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One night in Paris

One night in Paris

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Her skin was alabaster pale against the scarlet sheets. The air was redolent with the smell of sweat and sex.

He lay on his side without looking in her direction.

She took a cigar out of the holder and lit it. The pungent smell of the Cuban inflicted itself on the warm air in the bedroom.

She raised her hand and ran it across his lower back possessively, ‘Coffee?’ she asked.

He shook his head, the movement barely discernible with his glossy blonde hair shimmering in the half lit room.

She rose from the bed, the sheet falling off her body and headed towards the kitchen. Black coffee simmered hot and fresh. The cups and saucers had been left freshly washed for her. The maid always knew what to expect when she wore that lil red number, she smilingly thought to herself.

She poured out the coffee into two cups and took them out on a tray with the spoons entwined.

She stopped at the bedside and asked again, ‘Coffee cher?’ The boy looked up at her, his near black eyes glowing with dislike. ‘I said no, how many times should I say no to you? Last night was bad enough!’

She took a step back. She hadn’t expected this. Last night had started harmlessly enough. A one night stand – some fun, flirting, sex. Just a girl having some fun. Simple right?

Apparently not. The coffee tray fell as if in slow motion. Her fangs came out as she leapt on the boy.

I write. I take photographs. Sometimes I do both. Love travelling and meeting new people. Makes life more exciting.
Kits
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July 2, 2010suggest Post Under Flash Fiction - Comments
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  • http://flashfiction.in Aniket

    And just when I thought its an all romantic post? We have our first fangs.
    I believe we can never have too many vampire or dragon stories.
    They are such majestic beasts after all.

    On other note, I loved the first few lines of the piece a lot, where you subtly developed the characters while describing the surroundings. Plus you followed the golden rule of Showing over Telling to perfection. Bravo.

  • http://lifeaseetees.blogspot.com/ Kits

    Thanks Aniket. I thought it was over the top slightly. Got all the details but the end kept eluding me. As good as it gets in this one.

  • Aerin

    I had to go back and read the beginning again – I of course assumed the boy was just half-asleep. It’s not easy to catch me up like that (I’m a suspicious sort!!) Really well done!

  • http://lyricsandmaladies.blogspot.com/ joaquin

    woah – nice job – didn’t see that one coming!

    should’ve, though – never trust a woman in a red dress. or at least, never stay for breakfast.

    like aniket said – nice job of showing – the details work really well in this to define the characters, and the swiftness adds to its surprise.

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