Parasite
“You’re a waste of breath. Nothing more then a piss poor embarrassment. I’ve wasted more then enough time on you, and won’t rest till you’re choking on your last drop of blood. You’re going to find out how bad I actually am. A parasite, the nameless leech that I will now refer to you as. You have taken almost nine years of my life. From then till now you have controlled me, Controlled every aspect of my life. I find it amusing that you think that I would be overtaken by the swarm of perturbation anymore. You are nothing more then a disorder, an infection….A parasite. I loathe what you have made me and I loathe what will become of me if I let you rule my life any further.”
“Did you really think that I would allow you to survive any longer? Parasites don’t live forever. I simper at the thought of your flesh burning away. Each layer of muscle will deteriorate, and the bone will turn to ash.
I am free, I am no longer a victim of you anymore. Say you’re last breath, enjoy you’re last gasp of air. When you’re lungs collapse and fill with blood, I’ll enjoy you asphyxiating on it.” So I pulled the trigger, and the man I had fought for the past nine years was dead. With a grin on my face I placed the lustrous metal gun to my head.
“I’ll never be controlled again” I pulled the trigger, Then blackness. I’m constrained. Tied down. Where am I?
This room. It’s white, neat and precise. There’s no padding so I’m not in a psych ward. It’s just white. The light was coruscating. I didn’t think I could feel pain after what I had done. I never was “Normal” as they put it. I never though of myself at different though. Is this what death is? We sit in a white room for eternity? Am I in purgatory. Perhaps this is my personal hell where I’m destined to reflect on the hatred that has consumed for for so long. I want to get out of here. I want to leave this place, where ever this place is. My life is a complete lie. If you could call what I had a life. I feel like I’m dreaming. I could do anything, The floor is hard but strangely mailable. I can touch it. Caress it. I can feel it’s story, See it’s past. I am a parasite. I am a parasite. I see through objects and people and they never have a clue what I am. Good and Evil never existed in my head, Just them. They are what keeps me awake. They are what put me to sleep. They are everything and nothing to me. They give me advice and they punish me when I am “Wrong” or what is deemed wrong. They are long gone now. They will be forever. So will I. They will never understand why or how. They will never understand what has happened to me. Why it’s happened and why it has to keep happening. I am dead, I feel dead. If there was a mirror there would be nothing on the other side. I’ve tried reflecting but nothing comes back just darkness, Empty cold darkness. They never say me either I was completely invisible before They went away forever. Gone. They vanished in cold plain sight just as quickly as my reflection.
Parasite. The word rang in my head louder than any bell that had ever tolled. All that had stuck with me through all this was a poem I had once read. “With god forsaken I am mistaken as nothing more than worthless. I am a man without a plan, yet a damaged one at that. I have no direction or any affection to an infection such as you.” The reason that I hung onto these words like I had nothing is because I did have nothing.